School

The last week or so I have been trying to focus on school. I have done well at times, but not so well at others. I feel like I have a ton to do. I have 2 papers for my history class do in the next 2 weeks. I have Greek homework and corrections to make, and I have a lot of reading I have to do. So the next 2 or 3 weeks probably won't be the most fun. But we will see. Hopefully I can do well.

I have also been trying to fix my financial situation here. I have not been able to take out a loan to pay off the rest of my schooling because FAFSA still hasn't sent my information through. I finally was able to just fix the problem over the phone and it should be here by tomorrow. Then I will be able to enroll for next fall.

I might take a class this summer. I know have to take at least one extra class next year, and if I can just get that done over the summer while working full time that would be nice.

I haven't found out about the RA job yet, but I am definately praying that will happen. Thanks for all of your prayers in that manner. I appreciate it. I know that whatever I end up doing next year it will be good. So, I am just trusting God there.

Other than school not a lot has happened. My 22nd birthday was last Wednesday, and it was good. It was different because it really wasn't any different than any other day besides all the messages on "Facebook" and phone calls I received. I did go to dinner with some friends, and that was a lot of fun. On Friday I went to dinner with the family and Lauren which was nice. We had a good time. God has been so good to me in the past year, and I just thank Him for that.

Thanks for the cards and money for those of you who sent me that. I appreciate it a lot. I haven't completely decided what I am going to do with it yet. But I am leaning towards using it to buy my seasong tickets for football next fall. Boomer Sooner!!

That's all for now.

Prayer Request

I don't know if you all know this but Gabriel Lyons mom passed away April 2, 2008. She was such a sweet lady, and an encouragement to everyone she came in contact with. Be praying for the Lyon family. Gabe is a good friend of mine, and you know Christina, and Caleb, also.

I talked to Gabe tonight at church they seem to be doing as well as they can considering the situaion. Her death was a complete shock, and it will take a long time to get over that shock.

I don't know all the details about her death, but I do know that not too long ago she had surgery on her back and had some complications. She was recovering from thoughs, however. She noticed something on her leg and was scheduled to go to the doctor the week she died. But that night Mr. Lyons was walking her to their room, and when he sat her down she closed her eyes never to wake up again. That is all I know, and I am sure that you are just as surprised as I.

So, be praying for them. They are such godly people, and I love them dearly, and I know you do too.

Sorry I had not mentioned this earlier. I had planned to, but things have been somewhat busy lately.

Remaining

Last week my good friend Chris Goree was fired from the BSU. We (the ministry team I am on and the rest of the students within the BSU) don't know why, and he says he doesn't know either. Only the people who were in that meeting with him last Wednesday seem to really know. So, I have been in a confused state of mind from that, among other things. We do know that he was not fired for anything immoral, illegal, or anything like that. We just know that he is fired, and I have to be content in that.

I have talked to Chris several times since this took place. And he is doing as well as he possibly could. He is obviously hurting because he really doesn't know why he is being fired. But God has been very faithful to he and his family by sending several messages of love to them, and people coming by and encouraging them and giving them gifts. So things seem to be fine there.

I love Chris, he is an amazing man and has encouraged me a lot over the course of the year. He was our ministry team leader. Almost like our dad on campus, especially for those who don't have any family here. So I love Chris Goree.

I also love the BSU ministry and those in leadership there. John Kelsey is our director, and I believe he is an incredibly godly man also. I talked to him yesterday, just wanting to know how I can pray for him and the staff. And this is emotionally taking a toll on him and the staff. So I am praying for them to have strength, and to continue following God's guidance in leading the BSU.

Trusting both of these men and one of the other men who was in that meeting makes things very difficult because I want to believe both of them. And, so that is kind of where I am at. I believe what Chris has told me, and I believe what Kels has told me. They both have different points of view on the situation, and I can see why they would say what they have. But there is still confusion because we still don't know why Chris was fired.

So, why is this titled "Remaining?" Because of the Scripture God has given me amongst all of this. John 15: 1-8 talks about remaining in Christ. It also talks about pruning people who are producing fruit and cutting off people who are not fruitful.

I step back and look at this situation, and I see pruning taking place. The ministry of the BSU is very fruitful. But so is Chris Goree's ministry. Both have touched several if not hundreds of students lives over the years. But for some reason, God has decided to take Chris and plant him somewhere else so that he can become more fruitful (vs. 2). I really do believe that is what is happening. And I believe the BSU is only going to become more fruitful out of all of this.

For me, this all stinks. I want Chris to be here and continue to invest in my life and the lives of the people in the BSU and OU. But I don't know if that is going to happen. Chris isn't exactly going to go away from Norman. He doesn't know where God is going to place him. But he is trusting God in that.

I am doing better than most people are with this. I am not mad anymore. I am not depressed any more. And I am not looking for any more answers. Some people are, and that is fine. They need them more than I do. But I have a huge advantage in that I have been through something like this before at church. In fact the situation at church was much worse than this. But I can look at that, and see an end result. And the result is that First Southern is now exploding, and the ministry of the church is absolutely taking off. But so has the ministry of the man who was fired. I heard from a friend that the people at his church are really being ministered to through him. And I am happy that that is happening.

I know that if that can come true from that situation, than it can become true of this situation even more.

I told my MT friends on Tuesday when we were together that I am praying that we all become more fruitful out of this. I told the same thing to Chris, and he was in complete agreement with me. I had to remember that I am not supposed to rely on Chris for ministry opportunities. I am supposed to rely and remain in Christ. I don't think people were necessarily relying on Chris, but I could see how that could be true. But I have learned to remain in Christ through this, and I still am.

I am also ready to move on. I won't forget what has happened, but there is nothing I can do about it. But it is still hard. I imagine the rest of the semester will be a little more difficult as a result of this. But if I can remain in Christ, and see what He has in store for me and my friends, God will continue to work.

God is so good. He is sovereign, faithful, and loving. And I can't help but praise him for that.

John 15:8- "My Father is glorified by this: that you produce much fruit and prove to be My disciples."

Phone

Just to let you know, I can't find my phone. So if you have tried to call me in the past couple of days and I haven't answered or called back, that is why.

I'll let you know when I find it.

Glorieta

Last week was an amazing week. It was fun, challenging, and life changing. I was able to hang out with friends, learn about missions, God, and people, and I was able to get away from the rest of the world. It was great. There is a lot that God taught me, so buckle up.

One of the very first things our speaker told us was "Serving God is not a matter of location, it is a matter of obedience." This was a really good reminder for me. Sometimes I can get caught up in the thought that God is not going to use me as much here in the US as He will over seas. But that is a lie. God wants to use me just as much, if not more, here as any place on earth. So that set the tone for the week for me.

Suffering was the main topic of the week. It was really heavy stuff. Especially after 4 days of listening about different types of suffering, and why people are afraid of sharing the Gospel in different areas of the world. It was really good, and eye opening. But it really weighs on your heart. Once all of our sessions were done, and I was able to sit and meditate on what God was teaching me, I was really broken. On Monday, I wrote in my journal, " This week at Glorieta has been amazing, challenging, convicting, and heart breaking." And that is the honest truth. I was really struggling that day. I felt depressed because of the things that were being said. Not that they were bad, but I was really thinking that I had a lot to work on. And I do.

One of the first questions presented to us was "Is Jesus worth it?" In my heart I truly do believe this. Jesus is worth everything to me. But, I was challenged with the stories told of people who really lived that out. When our speaker told us that the needs of the lost are greater than the needs of the witnesser or believer. I realized that I had not been doing what God has called me to do as effectively as I should. I have been trying to build relationships with guys on my hall. I have prayed for them, talked to some of them, but I have never really been able to talk to them about Christ. And I think that has been because I am trying to do things on my terms and not God's. I am not really good at meeting people where they are. That is what Christ does, though. He meets us where we are. So I am going to try a lot harder to be with the guys on my hall when they are actually doing things. Not when I am not doing something. And I know that that will mean giving some time up with my other friends, but I believe it will be worth it.

Another thing that the speaker went over is excuses for people not to share the gospel with people in Muzlim and Islamic culture. One of the reasons was that they did not want those people to become Christians. So I was thinking that is not me. But as I thought about it some more I discovered I had a similar mentality. Sometimes I just don't want to witness to people. I get lazy and have no desire to share God's love with them. So what makes me any different than the person who says they don't want those people to become Christians. We learned that the greatest form of persecution is not telling people of Christ's love for them. Wow! That kind of sucks. So I really need to take advantage of every opportunity to share that gospel with people . Just like I Peter 3:15 in my post before.

The man who spoke has done a ton of research. He has interviewed hundreds of people from what I could tell. And his information was really good. He told about Muzlim culture and some of their reasoning for becoming Christians, and it will break your heart to hear these things. But they are important, because Satan is using them as obsticles for them to have to get around to truly know Christ. Also they are difficult for the missionaries to get around because of the warpe view that the people have of Christianity. The biggest thing for me was the fact that a lot of younger adults become "Christians" out of hatred for their dads. That was really hard to here because I can't relate to that. I have an amazing dad who challenges me to become more like Christ. Not to turn on him and do something that would absolutely dishonor him. But how do you tell them that what they are doing is wrong. I mean we have people here who say they are Christians all the time. But not for that reason. So things like that really just got to me as he spoke.

He also talked a lot about how to do mission work. It really changed my perception of mission work. All my life I have thought that I would go and evangelize a group of people that has never heard the gospel before and raise them up to be strong Christians. But that is not the way to do it. He talked about living the life of a Christian and having a native who is a Christian evangelise his people. Of course if they have never heard the gospel before you have to evangelise them to an extent, but ultimately it is the native people who are going to be able to relate to them the best. So if we can get one or two of them to become Christians and evangelise the rest of their people that is more effective. Also we are not to necessarily be the ones to baptise them. For some reason they think that if a missionary baptises them their christianity is more important or better. So we should let the natives do that. My job is to take the word of God in oral form and tell the stories of the Bible, and to tell the poeple to watch my life to see how a Christian is to live. He really emphasized presenting the Bible in oral form because 80% of the lost world is illiterate, and they can hear something one time and remember all of it. That is amazing! Especially since literacy is such a big deal here in America. But to be able to tell them the Scriptures in a way they can understand is really important.

One more thing that really stuck out to me is when he said not to give up in freedom what you would not give up in persecution. Satan brings about persecution so that we will shut up. Here in America we have not been persecuted, but we have been shut up under our own agreement. People keep saying that America is going to see persecution soon, but why would we if we aren't doing anything to deserve persecution. Most Christians don't share their faith with people. A lot, if not most, aren't even in the word. So why would Satan persecute us? That was really challenging for me because it made me realize that I have a fear of man. If I am ever going to go over seas I must overcome that. I must take action and live a life of obedience to God.

So that some of what I learned at Glorieta. The last couple of days were really fun. We were able to do whatever we wanted really. And I played a lot of cards and went to Sante Fe and stuff. But it was nice just to be with people for those last few days.

I did not post the speakers name simply because he is a very important person for his organization, and lives in an area where he could very easily face a lot of persecution if they found out what he was doing. If you want to know his name, call me.

Excitement

I am pretty excited about a lot of things right now. Mainly Glorieta. But there are other things too. Such as March Madness, and things taking place in OKC (They are going to build a new sky scraper, and I like tall buildings. I know, I am weird.), and just knowing that I am doing what God wants me to do.

But yesterday I realized that I get really excited about the things like March Madness and tall buildings, and they don't even matter. I don't think it is wrong to be excited about that, but sometimes I am more excited about those things than the things of God. So I am trying to change that.

Two verses come to mind. Matthew 6:33 says "But seek first the kingdom of God, and His righteousness, and all these things will be provided for you." When I get excited about things other than God more than I should, I don't do this. Colosians 3 talks about seeking what is above and not what is on earth. So I first of all have to remind myself that these things on earth don't really matter, and I should keep seeking God with all my heart and the passion that I seek those things with.

Another verse I have been meditating on lately is I Peter 3:15, "But sanctify Christ as Lord in your hearts, always being ready to make a defense to everyone who asks you to give an account of the hope that is in you, yet with gentleness and reverence." So basically Christ must be placed higher than anything else in my life in order for me to be effective. And as I do this I need to be ready for the opportunities He gives me to testify about His grace. So that is exciting also.

I think God has been showing me this for a while, but I am slow. Last night was a good reminder at Paradigm, as was my quiet time yesterday. But I am really looking forward to next week and seeing how God continues to show me this at Glorieta.

Other than that, life is good. I am done with mid terms and I think I did alright. I have been a little sick, but I am feeling better. And things with Lauren continue to go well. I am always learning about how to go about our relationship, and some things are harder for me than some would think. But I am learning to do those things that don't come as naturally to me as a lot of people. So things are going well.

Lightning

Sunday, March 2, 2008, was a really good day. Church was great once again, I was able to go home and see dad, the kids, and Lauren. Then Oklahoma weather came into play. I really like thunder-storms. I think they are really awesome. I am not sure why, but I think they are great, as long as I am inside.

Last night Lauren and I went her Grandma Phillis' house to have desert (which ended up being dinner) and visit. It was a lot of fun. Then all of the sudden bam... it is raining like crazy outside. Then the sirens went off. It was great, except for the fact that I had to take Lauren home, get my laundry from the house, and pick up my room mate Todd from the airport. All within 2 hours and right in the middle of this huge storm.

So I took Lauren home, and went home to get my laundry. I walk back out to the car to go get Todd and I open the garage door, and it was like we were in a hurricane. In my weird mind it was like trying to walk through an acquarium withouth the fish because there was no seperation between the rain drops. At least it didn't feel like it. I threw all of my stuff in the car and got in. I was safe... kind of.

You know, my car is a convertable. It is great. The chicks dig it. It is sweet looking. And it is a stick. It is great, and I am very greatful for it. But you know what, you don't feel as safe in thunderstorms in it. I think if lightning would have hit the car, I would have died. So I was scared.

I took off going a blazing 30 mph on 59th. I could barely see. I get to Sunnylane, and I am doing fine. I get on the highway, and flash... I can't see anything. Lightning had struck at least once really close to me. It was freaky! But I was thinking about it later on, and I thought, "You know, that must have been a glimps of what God's glory is like. BLINDING! AWESOME! SCARY! I mean seriously God said to Moses that no one could see His face and live. I don't know all that entails, but I think that a lot of it is because His glory is just that powerful. And then when Moses returned from the mountain to the Israelites, his face was radiant because he had been with God. That is cool.

Then there is when Jesus reveals His glory to Peter, James, and John. The Bible says Jesus' robe became whiter than any man could bleach it. That is cool. There was nothing surrounding them but Christ's glory. And it was bright. Really bright.

Chris told me a verse that verifies that God's glory is similar to a flash of lightning. But I can't remember what it is. So I decided to go to biblegateway.com. It is great. And I found a really good verse for what I felt in that moment. Psalms 97:4 says, "His lightning lit up the world, the earth saw and trembled." That is definately what I was feeling at that moment. It is great! Especially since I was just teaching about fearing God in Sunday school (that thought just popped into my mind). I was definately scared at that time. But I also prayed very intently that God would protect me, and He did. He never fails in doing that. Once I passed I-35, the rain lit up quite a bit, and there was no more lightning. I was very releaved. But I did learn from my experience.

So now I have a little better understanding of what God's glory is truly like: blinding, awesome, and scary.